So, anyway, this gives me ample opportunity (and by ample, I mean the 30 seconds before he wakes up) to talk about the nightmare that has been this crib saga. About a month ago, we got an email from Babies 'R Us saying that our crib could have been recalled. Ack! Okay. So, go to the website, and we need a number and a date. The number we could get from our registry. This date thing? Huh. Didn't know cribs had expiration dates. Apparently this date is to be found on a sticker on the crib. It will not surprise you that this sticker was in the backmost-underthecrib corner. Okay. Got it. Fill out form on internet, get money back, right? No no. Get UPS package in 1-2 weeks containing forms to fill out and on which to put SAME HARD-TO-REACH sticker, and also containing one (1) allen wrench for dismantling of crib. Dismantle crib, stick sticker, fill out forms, put crib bolts in pre-paid envelope, and then please to send back to crib manufacturer. Then in 1-2 weeks we will receive said bolts and forms. Then in 1-2 weeks from that receipt we will send you a voucher that may ONLY be used for the highest amount that the crib was sold for, that may ONLY be used at Babies 'R Us, and that may ONLY be used at a physical Babies 'R Us store. What's that, you say? Babies 'R Us is currently carrying only one (1) crib that cost approximately the same as your crib and is in the same finish? Zinger!
I got real mad. I got real mad, and I searched the internet for ladies who were even madder than me. (Which was not hard to do. Gosh, in my absence from the world, the internet has been populated with angry women.) Luckily, the angry women told me that they had gotten angry and called the various BRU/crib manufacturer people, and that they were allowed to buy a crib online through BRU (which had a larger selection than the physical stores) and that they were then allowed to bring their voucher and online receipt into their local BRU and receive reimbursement. When I called my local BRU, I was told that this was utter nonsense and that the angry women were BIG FAT LIARS. I was incensed on behalf of angry women internet users everyone, and so I in turn LIED and said that I had called the BRU headquarters my very own self and that they told me that this was in fact true, plus, reimburse me for shipping or I'll go straight to the top!
Clearly, I am an angry woman of great power, because they agreed to my terms (you should hear the one about how I convinced them to let me exchange all my death-cancer-plastic Dr. Brown's bottles). Of course, once I got online, all the other angry/smart women had snapped up the cribs (this was a 250,000+ crib recall) so there were 2 options: one for $50 more than our original crib, and one for $30 less. We chose the cheaper one.
And it finally arrived yesterday. And, sigh, I am not in love. I should have rechecked my Baby Bargains book, but I am a stoop and did not. The crib just feels so much more flimsy than our old one. And the parts all go together with plastic lock-nuts, rather than the solid wood pieces that were just bolted together on the old crib. And the mattress moves around too much for my sanity (I actually have to measure and see if the gap is just a gap, or an illegal gap). And it only has two heights for the mattress. And...well, I could go on. But the point is now we have to decide if we don't like it enough to 1) take it apart, 2) figure out how to return it, 3) order another crib, and 4) still get our reimbursement. And that, my friends, makes me ill to consider. I only have so much anger inside, and honestly, the bottle issue really took it out of me. We'll see how things progress.
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